TARPANA (Relationship Healing)
Is a healing ceremony that is used to release constraining thoughts about our relationships to others and to empower ourselves as an active co-creator of our lives. While Ayurvedic practices embrace foods, herbs, oils, and lifestyles as crucial healing modalities, it also acknowledges that our sense of connectedness to all things may be the most powerful factor in our well-being. By freeing us from the power of the negative thoughts that we hold about our relationships to others, Tarpana is a way to experience our true connectedness with all of creation. The ceremony helps us understand that it is possible to change how we view the world and how we feel about ourselves and our connection to others in the universe.
Begin the ceremony alone in a quiet and dimly lighted space. Light candles and incense and begin a form of breathing called the “re-birthing” or “connected” breath by breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth. Allow the inhalation and exhalation to be connected and don’t control the exhalation, allow it to excape at its own pace like a long sigh. When you are in a relaxed frame of mind, begin the unblocking process by first calling forth your ancestors and then anyone you have ever been in a relationship with.
Begin with your mother or father, then continue through each ancestor and other significant people. Visualize them standing before you looking into your eyes. Remember what they looked like, using your own memory or images from photographs. Remember your experiences with them or stories you have heard about them. Visualize them receptive to listening to what you want to say to them. Begin the clearing by saying “What I want you to know is__________.” Then tell the ancestor what you have felt about them. Are you grateful for gifts or genetic tendencies that you inherited? Do you feel yourself victimized by them in some way? Discuss with them your role in the co-creation of your relationship. Take this opportunity to forgive yourself and your ancestor. If you truly forgive then you are a ble to leave the experience behind you and no longer carry it with you. With forgiveness comes the ability to turn adversity into a catalyst for growth and a new sense of gratitude for the gifts they have given you.
Conclude your ceremony by symbolically serving your ancestor their favorite food or drink, something they would have enjoyed. In your mind’s eye, visualize them taking your offering, consuming it, and smiling. Then look directly into their eyes and see if you can experience them giving you a blessing–wishing you success in life, blessing you as you find your path, freeing you from obligations to them, and freeing you to pursue your own passion and purpose. Accept their blessing and visualize them walking in the light of their own path. Bless their path as they leave.
Conclude the Tarpana session by being centered and repeating positive affirmations: “I am love, I am one with all things, I am peace, I am joy, I am prosperity, I am forgiveness, I am trust, I am fulfillment.” And so it is.